I’m giving up giving advice for Lent

I’m giving up giving advice for Lent starting now, I announced to my class yesterday.

I’m also giving up sharing my opinions, especially at work but also in general.

My students were appalled. How are you going to not share your opinions? How are you going to not give advice? That’s basically your whole job, Mrs. Wanket. Giving us advice. Telling us your opinions.

You’ve just proven to me that I am correct in my chosen Lenten sacrifice, I said.

One girl protested. What if someone asks for your advice?

Even more reason to keep my mouth shut.

Okay, but what if Michael asked you for advice, she motioned to the innocent bystander sitting in front of her in the row. What if he asked you if he should go to college?

The Michael in question looked at me sideways

What business is it of mine if he goes to college? I asked. I could tell him he should go to college but it isn’t me who has to enroll in classes and live in the dorms and do the work. He’ll be in college and I’ll be sitting here like always.

So you don’t think Michael should go to college?

Why don’t you ask Michael what he wants to do? Maybe the answer is within him already. Anything I have to say about it would just be noise.

Nobody seemed to be buying my line of reasoning but Michael.

Later during break in the lunchroom someone sat down beside me and asked me for my advice. I broke Lent and told her what I would do in her situation but it wasn’t very good advice because my heart wasn’t in it and besides the person asking is smarter than me and more experienced in the subject.

I texted my friend who is also giving up giving advice for Lent that someone had just asked for my advice. She thought it was hilarious. Another person asked me for advice right after that. This time I was ready.

What do you think? I asked. And the person gave an answer way better than the one I would have offered.

I have a feeling that the world will still spin on its axis and everyone will continue to function without my input.

But that’s just my opinion.

(Students who are reading this, you should all go to college.)



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